We’ve added some new horror wallpaper to the Headstone City Family. Blaze on over to our horror wallpaper page and you can find multiple versions of The Shining, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Halloween and many others.

Conan O’Brien certainly has gotten the shaft. His show will now be moved to the 12:05 slot, to accommodate Jay Leno’s show at 11:35. It’s not surprising to see this typical stupidity from companies like NBC.
Anyway….Check this poster out! Based upon the famous Esquire cover of Muhammad Ali, we have Conan being barraged with arrows. At closer inspection, you can see that the feathers on the arrows are NBC logos. Very clever.

The 18×24 silkscreen print is hand-numbered by designer Jon Smith. You can buy one of these bad boys at Nakatomi.
Yippee-ki-yay, motherfu@cker.

Jay Leno is not funny.

Tired of hiding your prized possessions in those not so trustworthy banks? Can’t say I blame you. But you’re in luck! Up for auction is your very own human skull ballot box. Fitted with a hinged flap, the skull can be used to store all sorts of goodies…

“A rather intriguing lot will be up for auction at Christie’s later this month. An 1872 skull ballot box from Yale University’s mysterious Skull and Bones society will be sold as part of Christie’s New York’s Important American Furniture, Folk Art, Silver & Chinese Export sale on January 22. The skull has a hinge on top and is surrounded by charred-looking crossbones one inscribed with the word Thor.” check out the rest of the article here.

“It is suspected that each year, millions of dollars in personal property is damaged by hordes of zombies. And yet, regular insurance companies don’t deal with these claims.”

Head on over to My Zombie Insurance and make sure you’re covered when the dead arrive at your back door.

Hello Boils and Ghouls.
Every Christmas I receive gifts from a variety of different movie monsters. Last year Freddy sent me his Nike sneakers and this year I’d like to share my gift from HAL 9000.

I awoke early Christmas morning and quickly ran down to my crypt (where I put my blood-soaked Christmas tree). Under my tree was HAL’s gift, a box wrapped in black wrapping paper, resembling an obelisk. After opening said box, I was delighted to find my very own t-shirt based upon 2001: A Space Odyssey. Printed on the shirt are the instructions for the Zero Gravity Toilet.

In the Kubrick classic, one of the characters is seen studying a large list of instructions in order to use the toilet. When you gotta go, you gotta go and you don’t have time to stop and think about it. But in space, you have to be much more careful. You wouldn’t want to miss and have fecal matter floating around the cabin.

You can pick one of these cool t-shirts up at Tarfly.com

Thanks HAL!

Hey there fright fans. We recently added a new ghoul to the Dr. Death-Threads team. Keith Abt “The Dollar DVD Guy”, will be supplying you with his horror-filled movie reviews. Debating on wether or not to watch that fright flick? Don’t worry, we have you covered. Keith will be your go-to-ghoul on all good and bad from the horror bin. His first review is the Klaus Kinski 80’s classic, “Creature“. Enjoy!

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I was a teenager when “Creature” had a short run in theatres back in 1985. Even then I thought it looked like a low budget “Alien” ripoff, and though I loved a good sci-fi B-Movie back in those days (and still do) I never got around to seeing the film for one reason or another. Many years later, thanks to the magic of Public Domain, “Creature” turned up on the DVD rack in my local dollar store (on a double feature disc paired with Mark Hamill’s “Slipstream” no less), so I snagged a copy and sat down for some retro ’80s sci-fi cheese. Call me crazy, but I feel that the B-Movies from this era have more charm and character than any of the CGI-blasted so-called “B’s” that roll into our video stores on a regular basis nowadays, and “Creature” was no exception. It is definitely not original in the slightest but it was still a fun ride.

The plot is serviceable: a future archaeological team on Titan, one of the moons of Saturn, finds a collection of preserved alien life forms in stasis tubes, some of them dating back 20,000 years. Of course, they accidentally break one of the tubes open and the occupant wakes up and has the explorers for lunch. Sometime later a search team is sent from Earth to find out what happened to the first squad, and when they come in for a landing on Titan they find a ship from a rival German corporation already in their planned landing zone. They hurry down to the surface, thinking that their competition has beaten them to the find, which results in their ship crashing and becoming damaged beyond repair. The astronauts explore the seemingly-deserted German ship and are attacked by the title Creature, who looks pretty much like you would expect a low budget ripoff of Giger’s “Alien” to look like… rubbery and toothy. (The creature is kept mostly in shadows for most of the film, doubtlessly to prevent the audience from seeing its threadbare construction in full lighting.) Eventually the lone “name” actor in “Creature’s” cast shows up in the form of Germany’s Klaus Kinski (who usually appears in higher-brow films than this) as the only survivor of the German ship’s crew. He explains that “We’ve found someone’s butterfly collection… but some of these butterflies are not so friendly,” then makes plans to help the American crew reclaim the German ship from its nasty stowaway so they can all return to Earth together. Needless to say, these plans go horribly wrong, so the Creature gets to chow on a few other cast members (and take over using their minds/bodies using parasitic little sucker-creatures attached to their heads) before the remaining survivors manage to mount a final assault and take the critter down.

“Creature” was obviously pretty low budget but despite that it has pretty decent sets and costumes, and a sense of humor that’s often missing from other flicks in this genre. The cast (made up mainly of character actors from television) do their jobs well enough, and the action scenes are better than I expected. I seem to remember this film being rated PG-13 when it was released back in the ’80s but I wonder if that is accurate because of the presence of a few “F-bombs,” some pretty decent gore on display (including a head explosion, a decapitation, and a guy’s face being peeled off of his skull) and some female boobies would’ve definitely called for an “R” in those days. “Creature” kept my interest throughout and is something I’d watch again. Worth a look even if you’re tired of the “Alien” saga and its endless retreads.

Brought to you by Keith Abt, the Dollar DVD Guy. He suffers through these movies so YOU don’t have to!

3 Headstones out of 5

Finally, we have our third and final Friday the 13th of 2009. Looking for something to celebrate this unlucky Friday? Let me suggest picking up the Friday the 13th part 3 soundtrack. It’s out of print, but there are plenty of places you can buy and or download it. Nothing. Nothing is as cool as Disco Jason.

Never in a galaxy far far away did I ever think this would exist. That’s right, it’s the Tauntaun Sleeping Bag. Perfect for those late night sleepovers when you’ve been battling the Empire all day long. The sleeping bag includes a tauntaun head pillow and a stylish blue lightsaber zipper. Even the inside is an exact replica of the guts and innards of a freshly sliced tauntaun. And if you plan on sharing the sleeping bag with friends, make sure you don’t turn it into a dutch oven. Hop in your snowspeeder and fly over to ThinkGeek and pick one up.

happy happy happy happy HALLOWEEN!!! I hope your costumes came out great. Have fun tonight!

Sadly, I didn’t have much time to carve my pumpkin this year. I’ve been quite busy lately, restoring old caskets from ancient, underground crypts. I also had no idea what I was going to carve. So I  ran out to the local farm and grabbed the best pumpkin I could find. I came home, put on Creepshow and quickly brainstormed on what my Jack-O-Lantern should be.  When you’re short on pumpkin-carving time, do what I do; choose a famous horror icon. This year I went with an old friend from Crystal Lake. His name was Jason.